<FONT face=arial>I used acrylic paint on the leaves and the stems of the flowers. They dried nicely to look like the real thing. I am happy with this LO.<BR><BR><BR><BR>My battle with infertility and the hope and dream to overcome it....<BR><BR><BR><BR>The Elusive Dream<BR><BR>As a young bride, I was anxious to be a mother. I dreamt about how wonderful it would be to have my children grow up with their cousins and our friends’ children. We’d have birthday parties and sleepovers. Rolls upon rolls of film to be developed. Christmases, Easters, the backyard BBQ’s, horseback riding...oh the life our kids would have! Being in our mid-twenties and seemingly invincible, we never imagined what lie ahead in our future. When we decided to start a family, I was so excited! Friends our age were having their children, and we wanted them too. For them, pregnancies happened, children were born. We weren’t getting pregnant. <BR><BR><BR><BR>Step 1: Mora Clinic<BR><BR>I made a call to our clinic and asked to see a doctor about our misfortune. They advised us to try for a year and if it did not happen, to call. After a year was up, we were seen and counseled. I had to start taking my basal temperature in the mornings when I woke up. Filling out a chart for a month and being prescribed Clomid, I was still very optimistic. After three cycles of Clomid and nothing, a dye test was suggested. With this test, they injected dye into the uterus to make sure the fallopian tubes were not blocked. It was very painful and invasive for me. <BR><BR><BR><BR>Step 2: Dr Pavelka<BR><BR>After the local clinic did what they could for us, it was off to see Dr Pavelka in Fridley. Under his care we tried more Clomid. Life was getting stressful with having to time things and we were about at one anothers’ throats. We decided to take a break and took a year off from trying to have a baby. The news of a new niece or nephew...It was devastating for me that my brother and sister-in-law got pregnant so easily. I was happy for them, of course, but I was so angry that is wasn’t us. I remember sitting in the bathroom alone on the phone when my mom called to tell me. I could not find my voice to speak and I just sobbed. My mom sat on the other end of the line listening. She knew how my heart was breaking and could not help me. I grew angry at my friends for being able to concieve, such a rage of jealousy. I hated going to baby showers or being around friends with babies. That same baby of my brother’s was such a wonderful thing in my life. They let me visit whenever I wanted to and let me hold Grace the whole time I was there. I thank God for that little girl. She is my girl, I love her so much.<BR><BR><BR><BR>Step 3: Dr Corfman / Dr VanRiper<BR><BR>The second to the last of our options of having a baby, we tried gonadotrophin or fertility injections. I felt that it was worth it although unfair. Unfair that I had to do such horrible things to myself while others had no trouble having babies. Again I was mad. Before starting injections I had to go in for a laparoscopy to check for endometriosis. The procedure went well and against hospital policy, they let me go home without using the bathroom on my own. Later that night, I ended up in the ER with a catheter for the weekend and one really angry physician on the phone. The intern said he was angry they let me leave. Happy Easter! The injections were horrible and the injection area was sore and it hurt to move or walk. The hormones made me irritable and tired. After taking the injections and getting the right number of eggs to mature, we did artificial insemination. Nothing. I was beginning to get used to the let down and it was less of a devastation to me. I was done. <BR><BR>Merry Christmas 2004! A gift to ourselves: Invitrofertilization! <BR><BR><BR><BR>Step 4: Dr Nagel <BR><BR>On January 17th, we have an orientation for this procedure. <BR><BR></FONT>